July 9, 2011

• Enjoy

  We have to plan to do nothing every once in awhile. Summers are busy. I know if we don’t fit in some down time I will NOT be ready to start our homeschool year back in mid-August. So today was a “no plans” day. We got up late, made waffles, called up friends and asked them if we could come swim in their pool…they said yes, so we did, and now we are home REALLY doing nothing. Well Blake and I are doing nothing. The kids are dragging out a 20 minute job of cleaning their room into a never-ending project. But oh well, that is their choice, I suppose.

                        
            

  I can get so caught up in things sometimes. Let details stress me out. Let worry steal my joy. Let insignificant priorities come before the most precious things in my life. I have different words that seem to be branded to my heart during different seasons of my life. I think the word for the next few months for me is going to be: Enjoy
   
  Don’t those seem to be the kind of people that you admire? Those that enjoy. Enjoy their children. Enjoy their jobs. Enjoy being around people. Enjoy serving. Enjoy laughing at chaos instead of being overwhelmed by it? And Enjoy coming into the presence of God when life starts being a bully.

  

  I laid down with Camden last night. He had a headache. I cannot remember my children ever having had a headache. I know of a girl that passed away just a couple of weeks ago from a blood clot in the brain. Of course that was the first thought that flashed into my mind as I came in from my walk and Blake said, “Do you have something for Camden to take for a headache?” As I laid beside him holding him close I thought about all the Mommies all over the world with very sick children and my heart was overwhelmed with gratitude for the health of my children. Their sibling arguing, their disastrously messy rooms, my constantly missing scotch tape and scissors. Mindless distractions that I allow to steal my ability to: Enjoy.
   
  

  You know what else steals my joy? The things I don’t like about myself. Right now I am talking about the “outside” of me stuff. The fact that I am not near as skinny as I once was, my hair well its never been that nice to me, and my complexion, “Oh my GOSH!!” It makes me crazy. I am 30 years old and its worse than ever. I pray for healing. I spend money on expensive proactiv. And it still tortures me. Our pastor told us this past Sunday that we all have scars…physical, spiritual, and emotional. But we shouldn’t hide because of them. They show #1 that we have lived through battles and #2 that we can empathize with others. So I put my make-up-less picture on here in a step of surrender that my imperfections will not make me hide. Physical, Emotional, Spiritual wounds and scars – God can use them all for His glory. I love on the movie Soul Surfer where “Bethany” says that she would not go back and change what happened to her (the shark attack and loss of her arm) even if she could, because she realizes that she has the opportunity to embrace more people with one arm that she could have ever even imagined if she still had two. How life changing would it be if we could be so honest about our scars? Instead of feeling ashamed, or awkward, or envious, we can see our wounds, our scars, our imperfections even our mistakes as “platforms” for impacting the lives of other people. Maybe I will add the word “Impact” to my word “Enjoy.”

     

  • 7:11 pm
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