April 29, 2011
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What He Has Done
This day has been difficult. I awoke this morning feeling anxious about how I have been feeling physically…just weird; I think my immune system is down…I guess. I don’t know. Also Hope twisted her ankle last night. It is swollen. That worries me. Our adoption agency has not given out any referrals in over two weeks and today they announced the referral time for a boy which was 4-6 months when we applied is now 7-11 months. Felt like a punch in my stomach. I found out the only person I know in “real life” who is adopting from Ethiopia is going to be moving her paperwork to another country. I am having a hard time with that. There are a few other things I won’t go into, but I feel like I should say there are other things..I have this need to assure myself that I have just cause to feel sad. That its okay to be gloomy today. But under the disappointment, the frustration, the anxiety, the sadness…is just a knowing that God is near me.
Hope and I were sitting in the car this afternoon waiting on the boys to get done in the auto store. Hope was rummaging among our CDs and chose a David Crowder CD to put in. The first song to play was this one:
He is such a big, powerful God. When circumstances appear to have taken a turn for the worse….and I start feeling that I might be in this thing alone. Me and my emotions, my anxious heart, my hands full of my disappointment and my eyes downcast
He reminds me “Christina, I am your reward. I am your destination.”
Intimacy with such a beautiful God is enough. When I fall before Him in worship, tell Him that He is all that I want then He loves me back to the deepest part of my being. He reminds me of all the things that He has done in my life up to this point.
And then…He tells me that I am at the “water’s edge”. The edge of something that looks so impossible but its not…..not with God. He is just preparing to show off again. To show Himself incredible, to knock me off my feet.
Praise our God, for He is Good.
Comments (4)
I appreciate your perspective on this.
love your header! so sweet! Great perspective and thanks for sharing.
One of the little boys at my daughters preschool has a newly adopted Ethiopian little sister who is just the cutest thing!
Thinking of you!
oh, i understand the disappointment w/ the adoption.. so many of my friends who have walked this road talk of what a long, endless journey at times it seems. trusting w/ you God will work everything out in his timing and that that precious boy will be in your arms before you know it!
yes. no matter what our circumstances, God is bigger. love that reminder. one i think of nearly everyday.
happy new week. can’t believe may is here!